Fox – sly.  Trots – left-leaning (Trotsky) plus its more insalubrious meaning.  Foxtrots – leading the industry in a dance. 

2006 March 20

Breakfast serial. 5-star hotels.

I recently had a breakfast at a top-of-the-market hotel but as it was not me who was paying, I will not reveal its name*.  

Only a-la-carte was available, so I asked why no buffet? Because, I was informed, the hotel’s food & beverage director believes that guests at a (real) 5-star hotel should not need to get up from their table to collect their own breakfast.  

Obviously, I move in different circles (Ed: no comment).  

I believe that most 5-star customers are also human beings, and some like to order a la carte, and some don’t. Indeed, I believe that ‘choice’ is the most important 5-star offer.  

However, I was hungry.  

I knew what I wanted for breakfast, so I ordered it. But in the mix of cereals I requested, I was given too much of one and not enough of the other. (Because I only know what I want as I carry out the function of serving myself).  

Also, I like to top up my cereal with fresh fruit – but decide which based on the fruit available, and how appetising it looks. I like an omelette with more of one ingredient than another…and so on.  

So that in the end, even though I got exactly the breakfast I had ordered, with excellent ingredients, I had a miserable breakfast.  

(*For those wishing to know the name, please mail a US$100 bill – no, make that 100 euros – in a plain envelope, to my usual address. I may respond.)